------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nadine is the hilarious character of a chef that works at the Teamhouse. Known for speaking her mind and for good hugs she's a fun loving lady who likes to hike and spend time with her boys and has the craziest accent you have ever heard. I've enjoyed spending some free time with her when we can and she's been a great person to show me around the hiking trails of Cape Town. Although we haven't known each other for very long, one particular area of her life has had a great impact on mine. 


The first time I was ever in her kitchen, I noticed a small handwritten note on the refrigerator door. On it was written a personal motto of hers... 


It's a kind of a revolutionary statement if you think about it. As far as I know, Nadine hasn't recently declared her intentions to save the world, but she can cook! She makes dinner every night for the mission teams that come here, and although her cooking really is quite legendary... isn't it just food? There one minute, gone the next right? Does it really make a difference in people's lives? Does her food matter to God? Does what you "do" matter to God? 


May I suggest to you that it does matter. Nadine has taught me that it doesn't matter what job you do, it matters how you do it. Whether you know it or not, your life has weight. You matter. Your time matters. Your effort matters. 


What if we all lived life according to Nadine's motto? What if we got out of bed in the morning aiming for that lofty goal in our work lives and personal lives? What if we did everything on time, as good as it should be and with happiness on our faces and in our hearts? What affect would that have on us and the people around us? 


What if no matter what we do for a living, we lived to work this way? 


I think we could change the world... 

Everyday life here is one-big-giant contradiction. It's a head-on meeting of normal and really, really, not-normal. Truly, the intersection of realities here will stop you in your tracks and take your breath away.

Normal: I get up, work-out, shower, put on some makeup and do my hair, have my coffee, read my Bible, check my e-mail and get in my car to drive to work. I drive with the radio blasting to my favorite songs while applying lip gloss. It's my little world, and except for a few minor inconveniences, it feels pretty much like my life in the States. And then I get to work...

Not normal: I walk into work with people whose lives are being slowly ripped into pieces everyday by poverty. My co-workers are not any less immune to the effects of poverty than anyone else in the townships. I've been working for the past month with some of our home based carers in one of the townships, and walking beside them everyday, I see the difficulty of their lives and hear the hardship of their stories. Grace* has just lost her shack/home to a fire and lost everything she owns in it. Angela's* 17 year old daughter is pregnant and they can barely feed the mouths they have now. Pam* made some extremely bad financial choices in taking out loans and credit and is financially devastated, begging every person she meets for spare change even though she has a steady job and an income, which is more than most can say. Nan* has TB for the third time. I watched as Flora's* son was shot at and then arrested in the street yesterday in front of the whole neighborhood for dealing drugs. None of them had a hot shower this morning. None had a warm breakfast. Every one of them walked to work this morning. It's highly likely that they had no heat and that their shack roof leaked last night.

So what am I supposed to do about all of that? How am I supposed to live at the intersection of normal and not normal? I am the "sister" in charge after all. And I'm white. And I have the higher education. And I'm from America and I'm a "missionary" so I must have all the answers right? Right?

Can I tell you something? I do not have answers. I'm not gifted any differently than you are. I'm not any braver than you are and I certainly don't have more faith. Being designated a "missionary" is just a title. That title does not magically give me insight into sharing Christ or fixing poverty.

What can I give these women that God has brought into my life for just a short time?

What am I investing here?

I can only give what I have. My heart. My tears. My smile. My hugs. My prayers. My education. My time. A listening ear. Transparency. My faith.

In Matthew 25, Jesus tells us that it is a fact that we have all been richly invested in by God. Thankfully, we are only responsible for the portion assigned to us, but using what we have been given is NOT optional. We are instructed to "go at once" and put our skills to work. I just wasn't taking my responsibility seriously before now. I was like the scared servant in the parable, that kept his talent to himself. I was afraid of what you might think of me. I was afraid to fail. And in my comfortable life and paralyzing fear, the investments God made to me in faith, were wasting away becoming totally worthless.

So then, when I took on the job title of "missionary", it felt like I came out of the proverbial "closet" of Christianity. Because of the "big step" I took, suddenly I am aware that people are watching me. Suddenly I am aware that they have expectations of how a "missionary" should behave. But you know what? As a follower of Christ, I should have been aware of that all along. I didn't have to move to Africa to invest my talent and time wisely, and to give what I have. Geography doesn't change the condition of your heart. I could have been doing that at my old job. I could have been a better steward of my co-workers there. I could have taken the talents God gave me in Tennessee and put them to work. 

So now, here I am... all of my talents and time and gifts and skills and personality and experiences... all my eggs in one basket. No going back. And I show up to work every morning along-side these women with only what has been given to me. And I ask the same of them. Nothing more, nothing less. And I keep trusting in the One who gave me talent. And I believe that He didn't invest in me for nothing. And I trust that it's worth the risk. And I wait in hope to see the return on God's investment in me. 


Don't do what I did. Don't wait to take responsibility for the talent God has given you. Discern your God given potential and go live it! I promise you it's worth it!

*names changed

So... like many things in South Africa, receiving packages is a little difficult. If you are going to mail me something, it seems that the cheapest way to get it here is inside of a manila bubble mailer. South Africa charges me a "duty" fee for all packages received on my end so to make it cheaper on all of us here are some tips: 


1. When you mail it to SA it is called an "international parcel."
2. You must fill out a green customs form.
3. When they ask you detailed description of items DO NOT give extensive details. (ie) If you mailed me a North Face coat you don't want to put the brand or type...just put "jacket." 
4. If you mail me food don't mark perishable or it will never get here. 
5. No matter the actual value of the items don't mark a value down. Just leave it blank or put a VERY small dollar amount (like $3, $5, $7)
6. Don't bother paying for insurance on it. No matter what goes in the parcel, USPS will not reimburse for more than $250 US dollars and the reimbursement to you is automatic if they lose it. 
7. Mark "OTHER" not "gift". They charge me more if it's a "gift."


Other than all of that :) Mail away! 




Love to all- Ames

"Open Day" is the term we use around here for a community wide event that allows people to get to know what Living Hope does in their own communities. We have at least one general open day per year in each community, and then special interest open days in between. The yearly Open Day includes a comprehensive health check as well as games, raffles, food, music and opportunities to be prayed for. This is a great way for people that don't have routine access to medical care to get a yearly check-up and be referred for follow up as necessary. These Open Days are usually very well attended and we enjoy seeing everyone come out for them!



This year in the Ocean View township, we offered free eye screening, health screening, blood pressure checks, blood sugar testing, and HIV testing. Lots of great nursing things for me to do, including doing finger pricking and blood sampling for HIV testing.



While HIV testing is a vital part of what we do, I'm sure you can imagine that this is not everyone's favorite job duty. Not everyone, including trained and hired medical professionals, are eager to put themselves in close proximity to someone with HIV due to the risk of accidental exposure, albeit an extremely low risk. There have been many times that the assigned nurse hasn't even bothered to show up on the day that we do the testing just to get out of having to do that job. Obviously, that attitude might not be the right attitude, but at some point we all have been guilty of looking out for ourselves over others, so I'm learning not to throw stones. Sometimes nursing is gross. And hard. And messy. And maybe even dangerous. And sometimes we do cringe internally or hold back that feeling in our stomach, but that's what we are called to do as nurses, and even more than that, as Christians! (I'm sure leprosy wasn't any more popular of an area of care back in Jesus' day either!) So all of that to say, I didn't mind when I was assigned to do the finger pricks for HIV testing and I actually enjoyed getting to spend that time with the clients. What I enjoyed about cancer care in my previous job, was making scary things less scary, and I found that same enjoyment in counseling and testing clients for HIV. It was a great opportunity for me to demonstrate equality in the way I treat patients with kindness without the shame or stigma that usually comes along with HIV testing.



In general, I found most people to be way more laid back than I had been prepped for regarding the entire testing process. Most people were quite calm and prepared for their testing, which to me, is a sign that HIV testing is becoming more widely accepted. I was so proud to see several of the local lay leaders of the community publicly step forward to be tested, setting the good example for others, and several of our LH staff as well! I'm also thrilled to report that all of the people tested that day were HIV negative, which is great news!



In the interest of keeping it real around here and passing on valuable insights for those that might follow in my footsteps, we only had one small incident occur during a client's test. One of the pipettes malfunctioned during testing, and I got a small amount of blood splashed into my eye... BUT thankfully, the client was HIV negative and I managed to keep my cool despite freaking out on the inside. We of course immediately washed my eye out, reported the malfunction to the manufacturer, and I now know exactly how to take better precautions for the next time which is a very valuable lesson. (ie) Wear goggles and a mask always!

(By the way, just so you don't freak out, the chances of contracting HIV from a positive splash in the eye with a large amount of blood is less than 0.1% and I only had a very tiny amount of negative blood, so not to worry! If the client had been positive I could have taken prophylactic treatment, so there is much to be grateful for.)
I loved our Open Day, and I'm jazzed about the next one this coming Saturday on the main campus, which is open to ALL the communities! Hoping for a great turnout and more good results! Maybe I'll see some of you locals there!

And I'll cry if I want to.

Things have been a little harder lately. Not bad hard, but more challenging/difficult hard.

It's way more fun to blog about the lighthearted/quirky stuff, mostly because the light stuff isn't as gut-level honest.

I'm not sure when/how/if I'm supposed to admit that I'm homesick, but I am.

I'm not doubting my calling or wishing I WAS home, but after 2 1/2 months, I definitely miss the ease, comfort and convenience of the good ole' US of A.

But you know what I'm grateful for? That the hard stuff is also the good stuff. I know deep down in my heart, that this is GOOD for me. God has been more than faithful. I am learning so much. God is teaching me so much and His Word is sustaining me, which is what I prayed for!

It's a commitment that isn't easy. But sometimes easy doesn't equal better.

My pastor said this weekend that the key to his success in his entire ministry has only been to memorize one verse of the Bible and then repeat to himself 6,000 times a day.


So that's my plan for today. God is good. He is on the throne. His kingdom IS coming. And I get to be a part of it, IF I don't give up!

Thanks for your prayers!

Our neighborhood has 24-hour security guards. A few friendly Zimbabwean men staff the guard house about 40 feet from my back door and they are generally familiar with all the comings and goings of everyone in the neighborhood. Each night after dark the security guards close the main entry gate and you have to show ID to get past. Every night when a car approaches, they run out of the gate house to check IDs, open the gate for residents, and then run back in to monitor the security cameras.


Our house is on the corner, so it's driveway technically sits "before" the gate, which means that every night when I drive in, the guard comes running out to let me in the main gate and then has to run right back into the guard house when I swing a sharp right into our driveway, instead of the next sharp right onto the main road, making his 80 foot roundtrip run totally worthless.


I always feel bad for his wasted trip, so a few weeks ago I started flashing my lights at him when I'm coming down the road so he would know it was me and then he would know not to come out.


I'm happy to report that after a few nights of this routine my little plan worked! Now each and every night, me and my new friend, the unnamed security guard, have a system worked out.  Right after I flash my lights, he just sticks his head out to wave at me and watches to make sure I get into the house okay. And I gotta tell you, it puts a smile on my face every night.


Sometimes it's just nice to be known. Being known is what makes a place feel like home, even if it's the unnamed security guard :)


I think I'll call him Joe.  And tomorrow Joe will get some cookies. And tomorrow I will find out his real name. And tomorrow night I will look forward to his familiar wave letting me know that I'm home.

Do you remember the Lankford's I blogged about here? Last night Joey told me a sweet story about their family that made my heart melt.  

As he was tucking 3-year-old Baron into bed the other night, he prayed with Baron as he always does. In Joe's prayer that night he said: